So, you want to get banned and don't know where to start. You've come to the right place! I'm going to lay out my top secret never before seen top 10 ways to get banned from a forum or other online community.
#10 - Repeat Repeat Every Every Post Post
This is an easy but tried and true method to get kicked out of an online community. Surely when growing up you've played the game where you simple repeat everything a person says, right? Well, use it online to great effect!
#9 - Don't listen
Rules are for pansies! Why should you listen to some other person's idea of how to behave in a virtual public place.
#8 - Be Stubborn
If the website administrator or a moderator tell you to cool it off, stand your ground and continue the argument. Let's face it. You're always right, so why should you have to bend your will to someone else's point of view?
#7 - Use Profanity
Original Poster: Did anyone watch [television show] last night?
Your Post: You $#%$ing $#%# @#$@#@%@ $@%$@!
When they ask you to stop, tell them to $%#@ off.
#6 - Become a Troll
Most people hate forum trolls, but you're not most people. Becoming a troll online and causing mischief just to cause mischief is a great, fun way to get banned from a forum.
#5 - TYPE IN ALL CAPS!!
AND WHEN PEOPLE TELL YOU TO STOP AND THAT IT'S RUDE, IGNORE THEM AND CONTINUE WRITING IN CAPS. IT WILL BE LIKE YOU SHOW UP AT A BOOK CLUB AT THE COFFEE SHOP AND STARTED YELLING AT THE TOP OF YOUR LUNGS! GREAT STUFF! (As an added bonus, try to randomly use one or two lower case letters at the beginning of your sentences.)
#4 - Throw the First Punch
Forum Francine might possibly someday be rude to you on the website. Why wait for that to happen?! Yes, the preemptive forum pounding is a sure fire way to get banned from a website. Go out in a blaze of glory.
#3 - Fun With Links
An old standby for getting kicked off forums is to label a link one thing and link to something else entirely different. When people complain, simply use one of the ideas above for a combo one-two punch. You'll show that forum who's boss!
#2 - No One Expects the Spanish Inguisition
Whenever you possibly can, start to question people. While you can begin with simple questions about their day, their work life, etc., you'll quickly want to get into more serious and personal questions. When they refuse to answer, ask why they're so afraid of the truth!
#1 - The Real World
When all of the above methods fail, there's only one thing left to do - take the fight to the real world. Do a little digging online and try to come up with information to harass people in the real world - aka not online. If none of your other methods have worked, this is sure to get you booted from any website you want.
Note: This is satire! An attempt to tell you behavior to stay away from to stop from getting banned. Being banned from a forum or online community is not a good thing. In all seriousness, the biggest thing to remember about not getting banned from a website is to treat other members of the community like you want to be treated.
